This week I did something I haven't done in a while and never this way. I asked directly for help from friends and souls that I know. I asked them to share what I do at Nora's Events with their friends and spread the word. Moving my business of the ground feels like lifting a Boeing off in the middle of a hurricane season (sometimes). I bet any self-employed, freelancer, artist, and entrepreneur can relate to this.
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To ask for help is an act of vulnerability and genuine connection. I grew up as a child asking for all sorts of stuff from neighbours and friends; communism helped develop this skill. As a community, we needed each other to make ends meet. I am grateful for this experience. I see the mainstream narrative is all about individuals making it on their own. How can we build community if we don't need each other? Especially when we are told that all we need is our willpower, determination, and when we made it, we will feel so proud that we did it all on our own. That is the story we are fed. However, I don't think we can ever make it on our own, and frankly, I don't want to be able to make it on my own.
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If we ask for help, it means we are ok to be vulnerable; we have friends, or at least we have a chance to develop new friends on the way. Friendships and connections made when shit hits the fan run deeper than those based only on good times. A solid community is based not only on celebrations, rituals, and shared values; it needs people needing each other. Maybe we don't need a bowl of sugar anymore as when I grew up, but we need advice, connection, gossip material, different stories, perspectives, and to be seen.
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I used to belong to the Steiner School Community in Greenwich, London. I loved it until I grew out of it and left. Now I am starting from zero with a few friends around. I found my community online, on media of all places. Here I am, connecting, supporting, working and learning from people all over the world, and I love it. I don't know my neighbours, and I am ok with that.
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I hope you can also be vulnerable and ask for help; your friendships and community rely upon it.
Love, Nora