Nothing like a good old #moan. Ha?! It is an #unfiltered, #passionate expression of all sorts of unloved #emotions, such as frustration, exhaustion, anger, sadness, being fed up, mistreated, or bored. Why we moan? Because we don't want to feel like this, it's not pleasant, and we wish it to go away. By whining, we get to take the first step to acknowledge what is going on, even if we don't like it and even if we don't want to change the situation.
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To do that, we need someone to listen to us, preferably without judgment, not offering immediate #solutions, and compassionately without feeling sorry for us. We just want to get heard. Now you can say that is the job of a #psychologist. And if you can afford one, brilliant. Yet, I think moaning is part of friendships and community, and it used to be more in the past.
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I know about women gathering to do handwork in someone's home in Romania. It was called a "sezatoare". They gathered to do some hand work, #sing, #chat and moaned about life. I am sure they also shared jokes and advice, whether you wanted or no. Other cultures might practice this in current days. I don't know. The pub might have been a place for that in the past, but not now. I saw men playing chess in Greece, and some moaning was clearly part of it. I meet with my friends every week to play tarot, and moaning is also present.
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Nowadays, we are expected to be working on ourselves and heal all sorts of shit (which I think is a good thing ), but I also want to advocate for spaces, gatherings that hold the raw emotions without trying to fix it. I believe moaning is a part of the #healing process.
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Now don't get me wrong, I am not saying go on and moan every minute of your day. You will run out of friends and family members. But I think it is essential to have space for it in our lives, just like for all the other emotions and more engaging activities.
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I also want to incorporate in the events I organize space for sharing and being seen. So I am raising my glass to the good old moan and wish you all friends, communities to help you do that.
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Cheers, Nora